sing.a.song.of.sorrow [[OPeN]<3

[Crane]

l e i k o .
If you want to play it like a game
Well, come on, come on, let's play
Cause I'd rather waste my life pretending
Than have to forget you for one whole minute

Leiko's heart ached with sorrow; she felt as if her chest were being wreched in two. Her thoughts were just a dull buzz, thinking of him, mourning. Her eyes were closed, although she was dimly aware of the chill of the cold floorboards on her flanks, as well as the cool breeze gusting in from the window. With it came the sweet scents of the night; the tasty prey, adventuring from their dens, the fresh, tangy scent of grass, the slightly bitter scent of a lone fox wandering about.
Leiko was hunched over, scrunched up, hiding, denying the pain. Her pale ginger fur was dirty, matted, uncleaned for a while. There twigs caught in it, and a few burrs. Her neck was stretched out, strecthing her vocal cords as to better her singing voice.
"Lost and insecure, you found me, you found me. Lying on the floor, surrounded, surrounded... Why'd you have to wait? Where were you? Where were you? Just a little late, you found me, you found me..." she sang softly, pouring her sorrow into the song.
At the end of the song, she forced her emerald eyes open. They were dull, unfocused. The scene around Leiko was colourless, yet to her sensitive eyes just as bright as day. There were the white-washed walls of her room in the Old Motel, the shredded curtains dancing in the breeze, the claw-marked, smooth floorboards. The extremely comfortable Twoleg-sized nest, covered with the scent of Leiko herself, and just the faintest trace of him.
She inhaled sharply. Julian. Julian. Julian.
Her lost friend; her only friend. Killed in a battle with two BloodClan warriors - what mousebrains. The one who first found Leiko after her traumatic escape from her kithood kittypet nest, starving, lonesome, and half-crazy. He picked her up, dusted her off, taught her the way of the forest cats, of the loners who lived in the Old Motel in peace. How to hunt, and fight, and live.
But he was gone, gone, gone up to wherever the dead went. And Leiko was all alone in this world, no family apart from idiotic male kittypets, no friends, enemies all thwarted. No reason to live. Yet Leiko struggled on, struggling, fighting. No reason to live, yet she continued to live, for what she had no idea. But everytime she half-wanted to give up, a nagging voice in her the back of her head scolded her. Wasting Julian's precious work? Unthinkable.
With a sigh, Leiko launched herself at her gigantic nest, and landed with a thump straight in the middle. There she lay, thinking of the balck cat she saved her life. Who, after he died, Leiko realized she had loved. She sat completely still, and waited for sleep to claim her.

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This Twoleg structure was huge. Huger than huge. Dusk's wide eyes traveled up the immense motel, taking notice of all the nooks and crannies where prey could be hiding. This wouldn't be a bad place to stay for the night. After all, what could go wrong? She could stumble into another loner or something, but that was okay. She knew how to fight. The she-cat unknowingly unsheathed her claws as the tension pulsed through her fur. She'd never been here before. Dusk had become a loner only four moons ago, after abandoning ThunderClan. After they abandoned her. But anyway, she hadn't really been to the loner lands yet. She preferred living in the forest, very close to the Clan she had been brought up in. Although she enjoyed being alone, she didn't like the hopeless desolation that made up the outlands, the places where the loners and rogues lived. Even the air here crackled with an emotion that was... wrong. The cool wind combed through her fur and chilled Dusk, bringing her out of her deep thoughts. If I don't find a place to stay for the night, I'll probably get eaten by a giant rat or something. This motel was close to the woods, but still carried an ominous aura. It was as if every cat living inside was constantly reminded that they were on their own. It was as if the old thing could speak and say Once you come in, there's no turning back.
But that was silly. The she-cat shrugged off her exaggerated thoughts; what good was it to sit out here all night? So Dusk entered the Twoleg building, her paws treading lightly on the stark wooden floor. She could smell mice, so maybe it wasn't so bad. Large doorways loomed over her petite figure, and she could scent a few cats within the rooms they contained. She didn't want to intrude on anybody, but Dusk was anxious to meet more loners. Even though they weren't friendly. But it would be better than just being alone, right? At the end of the hallway she hesitated. To her left, a flight of stairs went to the second floor. To her right, another flight of stairs led down, to the lowest level. The stench of rats hit her nostrils; the smell emanated from the basement. Dusk definitely wasn't going down there. And she'd prefer to stay on the first floor, closer to an escape than she would be on the second floor. Blue eyes, bright even in the darkness, surveyed the rooms. All the doors were closed except one. It was ever so slightly propped open, and she could hear a mournful singing coming from inside.

This piqued her interest. If somebody liked to sing, that meant they had a gentle artistic side. Dusk was just telling herself this so she could be a little comforted. Even this small hope didn't change the fact that if she went in, the loner inside would most likely scratch her eyes out. There was no other choice though. She heard pawsteps and then a yowl coming from the first room in the motel, and could bet that an intrepid cat -- moreso than she -- had intruded on a rogue. Taking a deep breath, Dusk pushed her way in, and almost froze when she did. A cat was sitting smack in the middle of a large nest in one corner of the room. But that wasn't what had halted her -- it was the feeling of melancholy. Of complete and total despair that expanded and filled the room, and seemed to strike anybody who came inside. The cat looked like it -- no, she -- was trying to sleep. M... maybe she won't attack. After all, she looks really depressed. So Dusk parted her mouth and said cautiously, "Umm... hi. I'm Dusk. Who're you? Can I stay here? Just for the night, I swear." She didn't know why she had introduced herself; maybe all those moons of being a medicine cat apprentice had pounded politeness into her brain. Either way she was going to receive an answer soon. Unless the cat was dead. She doesn't look dead, she just looks like she wants to be, Dusk mused. Maybe she could offer some consolation -- well, assuming the loner even let her stay. But maybe if she did try to comfort the she-cat she'd get a place to sleep. After all, Dusk was good at that.

[Crane]

l e i k o .
Lost and insecure
You found me, you found me
Lying on the floor
Where were you where were you?

Well-rounded ginger ears pricked with interest, fear, anxiety. Listening to slight winds and light pawsteps. Long, oval muscles tensed, preparig to fight, or flee. A pale pink nose twitched, sniffing, detecting the change in the air. The smell of another cat; a loner, she-cat, and quite a bit older than Leiko herself.
Judging from the tension, the fear-scent, dancing on the edges on the scent, this would probably come to a fight. Unwillingly, Leiko pushed herself away from the bed, strong muscles lifting her up. The newcomer's scent saturated the room, her scent unfamiliar, threatening. The scent was odly familiar to Leiko, carrying an undertone of a forgotten memory.
The pale ginger she-cat eyed the rogue. Or loner, she didn't know; it was all the same to Leiko anyway.
She was pretty, very pretty. Even Leiko, hiding herself away from other cats for so long, couldn't deny that. The colour of her fur was bleached away in the light of the half-moon pouring in the window, but despite the colourlessness Leiko saw a trace of honey. Her eyes were blue, shining, even in the moonlight. She carried herself high, although her fur was a little scraggly.
"Umm... hi. I'm Dusk. Who're you? Can I stay here? Just for the night, I swear," the she-cat said, slowly, carefully. Like she was afraid that, at any moment, Leiko might jump upon her and rip her to shreds.
Which she still might.
"U-u-uh..." Leiko stuttered. Why would the cat - Dusk, she said - want to stay in here? With a dirty, probably smelly, cat like Leiko?
"S-so... You d-d-don't wanna... kill Leiko?" Leiko asked, shock causing her to talk in third person. But then she realised what an idiot she must sound like, and her arrogant side took over the shy, scared side.
She sat back down on the bed, and after processing the words with a calmer mind, she realized the cat meant her no harm. She realized her ginger fur was bristling, stuck together in some parts, and relaxed her body.
"U-um... Here? As in, this room? Hmph. Fine. Just stay away from me, you smell," Leiko told her, green eyes narrowed with suspicion. She snorted, and turned around, ignoring the she-cat.
Something was niggling on the edge of her memory.
Something so dark, so horrible, it was repressed to the very back of her mind, and she never thought about it. Ever. The she-cat's smell just triggered something in her brain.
And then it hit her; the she-cat had the scent of her enemies - however faint - embedded in her fur. Her blood.
ThunderClan.
Leiko let out an involuntary hiss.

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As she had entered the room, Dusk had tried to look as un-threatening as possible. But that posture was pretty hard to maintain, since this room and the cat inside it pulsed with emotions devoid of happiness. Dusk was used to socializing with cats... but four moons had turned her a little rusty. Now she was scared that she couldn't control what came out of her mouth -- like the half-hearted greeting she had just blurted out. But the she-cat was exhausted, very much so, and would do anything to sleep in a place that would shelter from outside. She felt a sharp burst of air from the open window and her ears picked up on the strange way the wind howled as it blew. It was like a tornado out there, and to top it all off the snowflakes were storming down like badgers were after them. Man, I really don't wanna go out. If this cat doesn't let me stay... For all her efforts to appear as casual as possible, Dusk was jittery, and apparently this loner could see right through her guise. The other she-cat had risen from her bed warily. She held Dusk's gaze as if she was peering straight through her soul. The gold she-cat turned her head away; she didn't like to be analyzed by strangers.
Sizing up this loner, Dusk figured her to be at least ten moons younger than her. Her ginger-colored fur looked somewhat dirty as if she hadn't bothered to keep up with her appearance in many moons. Despite that, she didn't emit any kind of rotten smell. Or maybe it's just 'cuz I've gotten used to bad smells, since I probably have a terrible odor myself, Dusk thought wryly. Jeez, even in the most trying of times her wit never abandoned her.

She leaned forward almost eagerly as the cat spoke. In third-person. She hadn't introduced herself, but at least Dusk knew her name now; that was a start. Leiko seemed to relax a little bit after she realized the threat was dismissed. But Dusk still saw a bit of anger blazing in her eyes. I knew I never should've intruded... I'm getting a bad vibe from this cat. She's gonna get her gang and jump me in the middle of the night or something. Maybe sleeping outside really is a better option...
But she was already in too deep. So Dusk tipped her ears forward with interest as Leiko once again spoke, this time still wary but less aggressive. "Umm... no, I don't like to kill people." At her next words, Dusk bristled. I don't smell! Look who's talking! The she-cat didn't say anything, though. It was better to let the minor insult go in exchange for a place to sleep. After all, she wasn't a ten-moon-old apprentice anymore, and her temper was under control now.
Dusk padded over to a small, dusty corner of the room, as far away from Leiko as possible while still being close to the door. She aimed to run away at the slightest hint of that cat attacking her. Dusk was naturally pleasant around strangers, but she had found out the hard way most lone cats weren't too friendly. After settling down comfortably -- if you could call it that -- on the hard wooden boards, she licked some recent wounds mournfully that were beginning to scar over. She'd always wondered why many loner she-cats weren't even the slightest bit pretty, always dirty and sporting numerous scars, and she had found out why.

Suddenly Dusk froze. Her pupils dilated and her tail fluffed out in the instinctive response to surprise; she was frightened. Had Leiko just... hissed at her? Dusk sprang to her feet, about to high-tail it down the hall. But to where? A cold, unforgiving outdoors and even more angry cats? Maybe if these dumb cats would just stick together, they wouldn't be so cold and ugly and dirty all the time! "Hey, what's your problem?! If you got something to say, say it, because I'm not going away." Her words tumbled out fast, but Dusk had to applaud herself for sounding firm instead of nervous. All her body language said that she was angry and scared. Those two emotions rolled off her in waves as she contemplated the she-cat in front of her. Even if they did fight, if Dusk won she would feel bad about fighting afterward. She hated to see cats getting hurt, and most of all hated to hurt a cat herself, since most of her life she had been brought up to heal instead of inflict pain.

ooc - sorry it took so long, my computer is ultra slow and my brother got on >____>[/size]

[Crane]

l e i k o .
Lost and insecure
You found me, you found me
Lying on the floor
Where were you where were you?

As soon as the hiss escaped from behind her teeth Leiko regretted it instantly.
But still. If a cat smelling of your worst nightmares had walked into yor nest - in reality - anyone would have had a little slip of control. A hiss wasn't much, compared to what Leiko was thinking.
[I knew they'd come for me eventually! she thought desperately, her dull eyes wide and bright with terror. And here she is! Distracting me, while the others come!! Fight or flee, fight or flee...
"Hey, what's your problem?! If you got something to say, say it, because I'm not going away," Dusk spat, anger and fear tumbling off her in waves. Her fur was bristling, to Leiko's alarm, and immediately Leiko leapt back upon her rough paws.
"You. Smell. Like. ThunderClan. Scum. Get. Out. Now," Leiko spat, crouched down and ready to spring. To fight; to get the ThunderClan dirt out of her room.
She was mad.
Very mad; almost ready to kill. If that cat - Dusk - so much as set a paw within her personal space... But then Leiko thoght for a second. Dusk was not a warrior name; maybe the she-cat had just been passing through ThunderClan territory on her way here...
Meh. She was here, and Leiko was angry, sad and confused. She was so dead.


{{ooc. late here and I'm tired >.> zzz so it's super-short, sorry!

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Dusk paused as she measured Leiko's reaction. Oh, StarClan, why?! What have I frikkin' done wrong to make you inflict such punishment on me? As soon as Leiko spoke, Dusk inevitably tensed. She expected the loner to jump on her right there and then, but they both seemed to be holding back. Maybe because they both didn't want to get hurt. A vulnerable loner was a good target for a hungry badger, rats, other cats looking for a fight and tons of predators. A wounded one wouldn't be able to survive, not in this bone-chilling weather. So why did these lone cats fight all the time? It was a question that had never been answered, never could be answered. Because it was simple: kill or be killed. One of nature's foremost rules of survival. The weak died; the strong lived.
And Dusk didn't intend to be the weak one here. But still, the medicine cat part of her almost sympathized with this other she-cat. Leiko obviously has some kinda grudge against that Clan. Why? Did they kill her parents or something? Frankly, Dusk was surprised the scent had stuck to her in the first place. She had tried to wash it out of her fur as much as possible; for the first two moons every time she approached a cat it attacked her or it ran away, since Clan cats weren't known for being friendly to non-Clanners. I want to leave my old life behind anyway. Will the scent stick forever?!

"I... I can see why you hate ThunderClan, they're pretty scummy and I hate them too, but please don't make me go. I really have nowhere to go and I don't want to fight." What a surprise! The proud, fiery, defensive Dusk was begging a loner for help. Backing down from a fight. I already have a ton of scars from other fights! I don't want another one! she thought fervently, her face heating up from how childlike she sounded to beg another cat not to fight. A strong warrior would've stood up to their opponent, but Dusk was no warrior. Not anymore, anyway. I'm never going back to that StarClan-forsaken band of fleabags, ever. Dusk had previously thought that after a while she would stop despising her birth Clan, but seeing another cat carrying the same emotions toward had reignited her passionate hatred.
"I'm not trying to be your friend, you can hate me or whatever, but is it really so bad if I just stay here for one night? I won't attack, I promise." Unless you attack first. In that case, she was ready... and reluctant.

[Crane]

My life
You electrify my life
Let's conspire to re-ignite
All the souls that would die just to feel alive

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Dusk was thinking; Leiko could see it in her eyes. Was she thinking about attacking? If so, Leiko was ready to fight. And win, clearly. If she were injured - or killed...
Would it hurt?
Would it be worth it? A few heartbeats of pain, and then the softness and happiness and calm of death. Or hell - Leiko didn't claim to be a saint...
Oh well. She would be with Julian! Her heart sang at the mere prospect of it. Now was the deciding point.
"I... I can see why you hate ThunderClan, they're pretty scummy and I hate them too, but please don't make me go. I really have nowhere to go and I don't want to fight," Dusk told her, her head dipped. As if shameful. Leiko guessed, from what she had seen of Dusk's personality, she didn't back down from fights very often. Did Leiko look dangerous to her? Her chest puffed out a little at the thought.
Leiko opened her pink mouth to reply.
"I'm not trying to be your friend, you can hate me or whatever, but is it really so bad if I just stay here for one night? I won't attack, I promise," Dusk assured her. Leiko doubted her word, but the two she-cats both knew an injury could be the death of them in Leafbare.
Leiko realised she had been holding her breath, and exhaled in a gust.
"Whew, so glad you don't want to kill me," she said acidly, her voice dripping with sarcasm. "But yeah, ThunderClan sucks. Those forest-freaks killed my brother," she added, the sarcasm gone. Leiko was surprised she had told a random loner something like that.
"I absolutely hate them. I'd kill every last one of them, hair-by-hair," Leiko growled. She sounded disturbingly like a revenge-bent insane cat. Oh well, she probably already seemed that way.

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[Crane]

<<ooc:: DONE. FINALLY. took a month :\